A Leo's charm.

So i'm completely head over heels over this bastard. I simply hate that i do adore him as much as i do, but you know when you've gone long enough dealing with childish crap that you do decide to let go. Well let me tell you, that was just me a little while ago (yesterday, last week, i don't remember). Can i simply just take a magic pill that would allow me to get rid of these feelings, you know? Maybe a little, "i don't give shit anymore" stuff? anyone? anyone? No? ok, fine. I guess i just have to deal with this drinking my stupidly delicious martini and yes, i will get drunk off of two or three of those, why? well because i simply made them consist of 95% vodka and 5% juice. Where is the olive? Doesn't make sense. Anyway, i fucking love this man with passion, wether it's a friendly love or romantic love, we know it's a passionate kind. I want him around for the rest of my life, but he's much older and frankly quite the man whore. I,unfortunately am not a whore, unless you count the only asshole i was with. No, i don't think i am. So, go me right? Partly i do believe this is my own fault because i did not show emotion or give as much contact i hould have, i am too afraid. There it is, i am too afraid. Why? because "i allow myself to think that every one man that steps his way will be just like the last asshole i was with." i found it.