yes

for leaving him. it's been about two or three months, i'm not keeping count anymore with trying to remember how long it's been and this is exactly how i feel about him. i don't want anything to do with him anymore, nor do i miss him, not even a little. moving on...



this whole work out thing is a part of my everyday routine, going at least five times a week to the gym, hiking or whatever it is i can find to do. my legs are already shaping up again and my eating habits are better. i eat tons of veggies, but i'll have chicken or something somedays. i may not be losing weight, but i am toning up and i can feel it.


i recently got my first commission job for a painting and you don't know much i am freaking out. i'm so excited to begin it, but the problem is i don't know exactly how to charge, for the canvas obviously and some paint, but it's only a 24x30 it's not big at all. wish me luck and maybe some advice?



now lets see...last night ohhhahah was something else. you know how in high school you always had a crush on a close friend of yours, but never did it cross your mind that you'd ever get a bit romantic? well, that's me right there, i had a crush on dan freshman year of high school and lasted through senior year, then i forgot about him until this past month because he came back to la and we've been hanging out with the same group of friends. things completely went to a different level last night, maybe it was the few shots or jack and coke i was having, but eventually one thing led to another and there we were making out next to the sink, passionately breathing each other in. we had talked a little before this and his ex girlfriend from years ago is now my closest friend. he says he loves us both as friends, but doesn't want to hurt anyone. she isn't interested in him romantically anymore because she's still in love with her recent ex of 3 or 4 years and yes, she knows we make out. while we were having our little pow wow, the sex thing came up and all i could think about at that point was my good friend. i can't do that to her, besides i've only had a sexual relationship with one person. i can't just throw myself out there because i'm single, sure it's my decision if i do or don't, but it's not a part of who i am. then he did his sweet talking and "we don't have to, if you don't want to" we didn't because i can't do that to my family and i shrunk back into my wrap. i also thought about what he saw in me, he's a hot young adult with a smile, dimples, and a grin that kills i can't help but smile back. he;s got a tight body with just enough muscle to be in the athletic category, then i see myself- eh nice hair, ok skin, nice eyes, dorky, spunky, sweet and chubby. as every day goes by i'm becoming more and comfortable with myself. in all honesty the words he spoke of me were the absolute most beautiful words i've heard come out of a drunk man's mouth (lol), followed by a soft kiss after every compliment that was said. i can be myself around him and i adore that.  and those glasses...prescription